It has been a dreary day. The sky is overcast but as I looked out the window in the distance I could see a flock of geese soaring in flight. I immediately thought of Lolly. I cannot see a goose or hear one honking without memories of my husband flooding my mind. He was an avid sportsman who spent many winters on the river hunting water fowl.
I was discontent today. All week long my thoughts have been centered on my friends, Pam and Jack. My mind and prayers have been entwined around their family. I looked for busyness to divert my mind and ease the angst in my heart but today busyness did not work it’s magic.
I walked to the mailbox. I thumbed through the mail shivering as I returned to the warmth of my house. Most of it was junk; advertisements and catalogs but amidst the junk mail was a card from my sweet niece, Amie. I sat down in my chair and opened the card. Inside was a handwritten letter to me. As I unfolded her letter a tiny golden maple leaf fell into my lap. I picked it up and laid it atop my Bible as I began to read her letter. I did not ask her permission but I am going to share a small portion of what she wrote to me.
Dear Aunt Nicki,
“This will sound strange but the other night I woke up at around 3 a.m. and felt led to send to you, of all things, a leaf. And to explain why I’ve sent you a leaf…it is a symbol. This leaf has been battered by the cold weather and looks different than it did just a little while ago. And though it’s not the same and not perfect, it is still beautiful. And the tree it came from has lost all of its leaves and holds a different kind of beauty throughout winter. Even though it is bare and has been through all kinds of weather, it is still very alive. Spring is just around the corner and it is not long before it will be in full bloom again. I believe this is true for your chemo and radiation beaten body. You have gone through so much and I cannot imagine what these past few months have been like for you. I pray that your “spring” will come swiftly and that your body and spirit will be completely refreshed and renewed. And that with your healing will come an abundant freshness for life.”
With much love,
I framed that beautiful golden leaf. It now sits beside a precious picture of my family; the last picture taken of us while Lolly was alive.
Thank you, darling Amie for the gentle, tender reminder that spring always follows a barren winter. I love you back.