Follow up on #5


My sister,Glenda came to stay with me after treatment. As always, she was my solid rock totally taking care of all my needs to the best of her ability. I don’t know how I would get through all of this without her care.

I was able to get my compression garments and I was shocked at how very tight everything was. The lymphodema therapist took one look at my swollen hand/arm and told me they were too tight and to not wear the day sleeve until it could be adjusted. The glove and arm sleeves are made from my own measurements. Either the measurements were not correct or the maker of the garments did not fabricate them correctly. Now they will have to be re-made. The glove is thick and cumbersome but I am told to wear it as much as I can stand. It literally turns the tips of my fingers blue and I cannot wear it for long periods of time. I worry about wearing the glove and trying to work on the computer since the fingers don’t bend or function well with it on. The night sleeve is a bulky quilted fabric that is about 1/2 ” thick. Once I get that lovely thing on my hand and arm I  have to put a compression sleeve over the whole thing. I have not been able to wear the contraption all night long yet. It will take me a little while to get used to sleeping with it. In the morning when I remove the sleeve, my arm looks like a waffle with indentations all over it. There are so many adjustments to get used to.

The intestinal infection has returned with this treatment so I am back on antibiotics once again.

The second toe on each foot is now bruising. I am not certain why this is happening. I was told the drug Taxol could make you lose your fingernails. I take Taxotere instead. However, my fingernails are now bleeding underneath. It started with only one finger but now each one has a small blood particles underneath the nails. I was hoping that I would not lose my nails. Perhaps with only one treatment left, I can still save them.

Although thin, I have some eyelashes and my eyebrows. It is funny but having eyelashes and eyebrows make me feel more feminine. My hair is starting to grow some but it is mostly gray in color. Ethan is hoping it will come in all gray like Paula Deene’s. I smile because he thinks she is just beautiful and no matter what my hair looks like when it returns, he will think I am beautiful too.

I need to make a decision on radiation. The doctor would like to start radiation after my 6th chemo treatment. I am prayerfully seeking guidance on this issue. I do not want radiation for a number of different reasons. The plan is to radiate the areas where I had tumors to prevent a reoccurrence of cancer in those sites. I will have to make an important decision and I want it to be the right choice for me. I will speak with the radiologists to weigh the benefits versus the side effects of radiation and then make my decision. The doctor said this is a gray area for me and I will need to decide how much I want to put my body through. Please pray for total peace about my decision.



4 responses »

  1. Nicki
    I do pray for you that you can find it inyourself to make whatever decisions you need to make, but find somone to talk to about it – someone that can perhaps give you insight on the procedure – there are always pro’s and con’s and 2nd opinions, but I have so much faith in you and the knowledge you have gained through this will help you to know which direction to take. I wish I knew all the in’s and outs of what you’re going through, but I don’t – talk to the nurses that work with you when you go in for chemo- they are always so gracious and have allot of good information. it’s not always true that the doctor knows “everything” (I say that fecisiously) – I think the nurses see so many patients in their time that they could give you some insight of some things and you can learn from them – It will work out for you Nicki- stay strong….

  2. Hi Nicki, my children have brought me up to date about you. We met with Sandra, Rose, Betty and Art last week and they were talking about you and they brought us up to date about you and we just read your blog #5. it is indeed a hard decision. You have gone through so much, are you sure you want to continue your days this way. We can’t decide for you, but we will pray much for you. Interestingly Sen and I can’t get around much, but we have lots of time to pray and you are on our list to pray much for. Remember “With God, nothing is impossible”.

    We do love you. Keep looking up, He’s coming soon.
    Sen and June

  3. Dear Nicki, Want you to know my thoughts and prayers are with you. I don’t know the answers for you, but you and I do know the One who does, and He knows you. This chorus just came to me. “He knows my name, He knows my every thought, He sees each tear that falls and He hears me when I call.” I love you, Mommy Marcy

  4. Write down all your questions, each time you think of something, jot it down. Look online to see what other people have questions about…and then put those on your list. Have these ready when you see a radiologist. And of course…take along Paige and Todd as your backup eyes, ears and memory. You still have some time before this decision has to be made. I agree with Vicky…don’t just talk to the doctor…ask nurses in the radiology department too. They see more than the doctors. Love you, M

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