This week has been an emotional roller coaster. I worked full days and physically I was whipped at the end of each day.My tissues from the surgery site still swell and cause discomfort. When I am tired (with or without chemo in my body), emotions rise to the surface.
Wednesday was our wedding anniversary. It would have been 42 years of marriage for us. This year, I did not have the energy to go to Parma and visit the cemetery to place flowers on Lolly’s grave.
Both Todd’s family and Paige’s have been sick the last few weeks and I have missed seeing them something fierce. We cannot be together when anyone is sick. They are a part of my strength.
Tonight the family is gathering at my sister’s home to celebrate my nephew, Travis’ 40th birthday. I did not have the energy to drive to Parma after work and then drive home to Star in the same evening. I love being with all the family and I miss not being part of the celebration.
Tomorrow morning, barring any negative blood work I will have my third chemo treatment. I have such mixed emotions; dreading the chemo and it’s awful reactions with my body yet anxious to have it. The third treatment marks the half way point of the “hard stuff”. Again I am needing prayer. I finally gave way to an exclusive pity party ( no one else invited but myself) and cried. It felt good to let go of the emotions. In spite of everything difficult this week, I have blessings to share.
Yesterday’s blessings: Phone calls from a friend in Baker City and another friend called from Yakima.
Two co-workers who took me to lunch while my taste buds could appreciate the taste of food. Yummy.
Today’s blessings: A new devotional book given from Drew and Debra. Thank you, friends.
A gift and card sent via mail to boost my spirits from Toni and Ben. How gracious of you to think of me. Again, my thanks.
A morning dove; I left the office on my lunch hour and drove to a shady spot to eat and listen to music. A morning dove shared the shade with me. I watched her breast rise and fall as she serenaded me with her cooing. Precious to watch and comforting to listen to. She spoke to my heart.