Hurting a Little


We were in the kitchen slicing apples to dip in my caramel sauce.  Ethan asked, “Grandma, are you going to have surgery?” I replied, “Yes, Ethan, I am.” He turned his back to me and pulled up his t-shirt to wipe tears from his eyes. I placed my hands on his shoulders, turned him and gently cupped his chin to force his eyes to meet mine. He did not want me to see him cry. I asked, “Ethan, do you remember when Daddy called me last fall and said the ambulance was taking you to St. Al’s because you had fallen at school; your leg was split open?” With tears glistening in his eyes, he shook his head; nodding yes. I continued, “The first thing I heard when I entered the emergency room was the sound of your voice screaming. Do you remember why you were screaming?” He answered, “Yes, they were cleaning the cut and giving me shots to deaden it.  It really hurt, Grandma.” I pulled his head to my shoulder remembering that day. I held him and said;”Ethan, the doctor had to clean the wound so no infection would occur. Then he deadened the area so he could stitch your leg back together again and make you whole. It hurt but your leg got better. You were very brave that day and I was proud of you. That is the way it will be with Grandma.  I will have to hurt for a little while so I can get better. I will need to be brave like you were.”  He asked one more question, “Grandma, will we still be able to come and spend the night at your house?” I replied emphatically, “YES”. Those four darling boys are my reason for fighting.

The co-worker, who gave me the purple “blessing” journal wrote these words inside of my book; “I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I‘ve brought a big bat.  I’m all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!”–Dr. Seuss

Look out cancer! I am going into surgery tomorrow with a bat at my side, running shoes on my feet and prayer warriors all around me!


17 responses »

  1. And like Ethan, you WILL get better! So there will be a lot more sleep overs! 🙂 Thinking of you every hour of the day. God has your hand thru this journey. Love you, M

  2. Yes, Mama……we are the prayer worriers and are with you all the way. God will bless and keep you safe for those little ones.

  3. Nicki, You are an awesome grandmother…..bless your little boys and we know you will be here to see them become big boys !!! You are in thoughts and prayers…God bless you and your family.

  4. You better believe you have prayer warriors all around you. We were just with Boyd Matthews tonight and he was remembering how you used to bring hot chocolate to all the guys working on the snow mobiles at your shop. Of course he is missing his wife right now. We love you Nicki!
    Know that the Lord is with you each step of the way!

  5. I will be in my garden tomorrow thinking of you Nicki, and knowing you are fighting the first of many battles. I will think good thoughts for you and your family. Remember your garden awaits you to heal and gather strength and joy when you come home to heal. Blessing will come to you.
    Love, Nancy

  6. My boys love their Grandma and we love our momma! Your grandson’s would worry about you no matter how small the injury. I can only imagine how hard tomorrow will be for you but I KNOW how courageous you are. We are all here to help you get through this in any way you need us to be. I love you so very much!

  7. My boys love their Grandma!!! I can only imagine what your feeling but I know how strong you are. You will get through this and we will be here in any way you need us to be! We love you so very much!

  8. Over the years we have held each other, we’ve shared our stories, we’ve cried together, and we always end up laughing…. We will laugh again soon! Love and prayers to you and the kids.

  9. I am praying for you. But you are such a positive person, you will go through with flying colors holding that baf if anyone gets into your way


  10. Good to hear that you are armed and ready to fight. Just remember, there are others who are waiting in the ranks for back up support – anytime. Take care, I wish you a quick and easy recovery.

  11. Thinking of you and praying for you while you fight this battle. So glad you have this blog so we can keep up with how you are doing without bugging you. Technology like this is a blessing so that you don’t have to tell and then tell again how you are doing to each and every one of us who are thinking about you. Do NOT feel guilty about not answering phone calls or responding to cards. We are just trying to make sure you feel loved and supported. You talk when you want and feel like talking, not out of a feeling of obligation. Okay? Okay.

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